on teaching, kind of.

Evelyn and I had lunch with mr yeo today. He asked us how our attachment was going, how we found the school and we told him about what we were studying in uni. I asked if he had kids and he told us about his three very successful children. He spoke about how he pushed them to do sports and how he felt sports and academics were very interrelated and the attitude in sports will carry over to the academics. He is the teacher in charge of cross-country for the school, and I started to ask him about how he ran it (pun not intended) and if he still runs himself. He said he did and he was still doing half marathons and marathons. Hearing people run always amazes me. I used to love running at some point, but have come to dislike it because I get lazy and bored. Mostly lazy. I think. And running isn’t easy, which can be something appealing or repulsive. I used to like the challenge and would push myself every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday during trainings, going even I did not feel like it, and giving (most of the time) my all for the fartleks, intervals or long distance running. I should run again. hm. Saying it and actually acting on it are two very different things. Mr yeo talked about passion. And how it doesn’t matter if you are good at running or not, if you have the passion, the students will be able to tell and you will be able to inspire them. It’s the same in teaching too, he was saying. That moe may appoint us to be teachers, but our students are the ones who actually determine if we truly are teachers. 

Having a good class makes my day. Good class does not mean that the class needs to do well academically, or do art well, but them just being engaged and interested in their art making and seeing them enjoying the work that they do is what makes it a good class. To see that they have taken something away from class – be it as deep as taking to heart something you say and truly thinking or pondering about it, or as simple as learning how to make a tree out of paper and satay sticks, is humbling. There are classes though, that some plans just fall through, or the class happens to be tired or restless. I have not gotten to a point of being confident of making decisions on my feet and I think its something that comes with experience, that I am going to give myself leeway and time to grow in. it is a challenge, that I gladly accept. Maybe gladly is the wrong word. I accept, knowing that I’m going to struggle and at times just be on my bed and not wanting to do anything but just lie there and wait for life to pass me by (this has already happened a couple of times and it’s but week three). And it’s not that students are difficult, but I think its just the pressure on self, of wanting to do the best I can, how can I adapt to different classes/individuals, and what method of teaching suits the class/individual the best. I used to think that teaching the same thing to a couple different classes would be boring, but each class is so different. And each class isn’t just a body, but made up of individuals that are each very special in their own right. Human interaction to me is so important, and I feel that building relationships and people are about the most important part of life. It’s what gives life meaning I think, to connect with someone, to laugh over something, to cry together, to struggle together, to be awkward, to be embarrassed, to be real.